Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Oldie But Goodie: A Cover

This song is soooooo old that it may be B.C.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Monday, December 22, 2008

"Gift Of A Lifetime" (on canvas)

Back in the winter of 1988, my daughter and I built a snowman in the back yard with the help of her mom and our cat Nicky(I think he wanted the carrot).

A photograph was taken showing the snowman being admired by me, my daughter and Nicky.I have had that photo on my fridge for quite sometime.

Yesterday, I got the best Christmas gift that I have ever received in my whole life.It was from my daughter.

She graduated this weekend from S.U. with a Bachelor of Fine Arts degree. Her final project was an oil on canvas painting of that photograph.

A month ago, she asked me what I wanted for Christmas and I said that I didn't need a thing. (She needs to save her money as she is embarking on the next phase of her life).

She did not buy me anything. She did not spend a penny on me. She did what she has done for the last 21+ years of my life.

She gave me her final project.

She gave me "Gift Of A Lifetime".




Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

877-467-3277

Every other day this phone # appears on my caller I.D.
I am always away when the call comes.
Today, I was home and answered the phone.There was nobody there.
I googled this phone # and found out that I am not the only one that is being bothered by this #.
877-467-3277 has taken on a life of it's own.Reminds me of the Stephen King novel Christine.

I have done my share of messing with telemarketers, but this guy is the master.



Monday, December 15, 2008

Shoes in the News

I think our Prez is pretty agile for a man of his age.

If Gore (with his pumpkin head) or Kerry (with his elongated horse head) had been standing at the podium, we would be watching a state funeral this weekend instead of more football.

Speaking of football and Washington, Santana Moss can shine those shoes for you (but it will cost you 15 yards)!

(Let's all hope that B.O. can catch both and do an end zone dance worthy of M.J.)

After Further Review

If he had caught the ball thrown to the outside of the pylon with two feet in the end zone, yet the ball was never over the end zone, would it be ruled a touchdown?

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Crack The Case: Open and Clothes Case

The Case
A woman suddenly disappears from her home, leaving all of her clothes behind-even the ones she was wearing!

The Mystery
What became of the woman?

Need a clue?

Friday, December 12, 2008

So I'm Not Bob Dylan

Back in '55

We were young and wild
We were young and sure
We were MAKIN' THUNDERBIRDS



bob seger

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Baddest Boys of 1965

my R.S.V.P.

My daughter graduates from college on the 20th and a celebration will be held the next day.
Will I be there?


Monday, December 8, 2008

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Friday, December 5, 2008

Mother (Live)

Youtube Is Like A Yard Sale,

You never know what you will find.
Example: I was looking for a socket set and came home with a ceramic pelican.
I did not need a ceramic pelican, but the more I look at it the more it grows on me.
Check out my find. Sure beats a socket set!

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

My Favorite CD

Swamp "Guitar" Critter

Some people collect stamps. They call them philatelists.
Some people collect coins. They call them numismatists.
Some people collect guitars. They call them when the last song is played and the instrument is in the case.
Here's one I've never heard.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Friday, November 28, 2008

Black Friday

What is wrong with the populace of this country?
What would impel a human being to get up in the middle of the night, stand out in the cold and participate in a stampede that would make the Running Of The Bulls pale in comparison?
I can answer both questions with one word.
STUPIDITY
Yes,we are a country of STUPID people. No wonder we are "Headed to Hell in a Handbasket".
I would rather have a root canal than participate in this insanity that corporate America has shoved up our asses in the last decade.
Until someone sues Wal-Mart and their ilk on grounds of stupidity, the insanity will continue.
I hope that the largest corporation in the world at least gave this stupid girl a new wig!

Thursday, November 27, 2008

1-800 BUTTERBALL

I called them today but all operators were unavailable due to the large volume of calls.I did not have a question as I fixed Thanksgiving dinner last night and will enjoy the leftovers today.
If I had gotten through to a live operator, I would first wish them a Happy Thanksgiving and then ask them how many calls they had gotten today by last minute shoppers asking them how to thaw and cook a 27 lb turkey in 2 hours (Is there a crematory within driving distance?).
Here's wishing you a thankful day.



Tuesday, November 25, 2008

the origin of MY species

For as long as I can remember, there has been a portrait hanging on the wall of a house in my family.The portrait now hangs in my house on a wall.
The portrait is of my ancestor,Charles Darwin M.
I was always told that he was named after THE Charles Darwin,the evolutionist.
Today I found out otherwise. Charles Darwin was born in 1809 and Charles Darwin M. was born in 1826.Unless Charles Darwin was a 17 year old prodigy at the time,I have been lied to.
My whole life could have been different, if this evolution crap had not been force fed me from day one under false pretenses.As far as I know,that portrait could have been purchased at an antique shop.
I will follow my childhood aspiration of becoming an Episcopal minister after viewing the following video.
Maybe...maybe not?

Thursday, November 20, 2008

The Crunge

Where's that confounded bridge?
It's in the Pocomoke Forest!
I spent several years roaming this forest in search of the strange happenings that were said to be going on there.My friend(s) and I cruised that place from the left ventricle to the right ventricle and were never spooked once.
We stopped on the bridge, we peeked in the windows of the Warren mansion,we climbed the Old Furnace and we ventured into all the graveyards.
There is nothing there but deer ticks, chiggers and some fond memories of my youth.
Lately, there has been a renewed interest in the hauntings of the Forest.
That is to be expected, as the dope that they are smoking is ten times more potent.
See for yourself...





Wednesday, November 19, 2008

November(19)

I gotta keep up with the calendar.
19 posts in 19 days.

Welcome to my graveyard(bookmarks).









Women Are Smarter

I'm scared and I've taken a beating in the stock market, so I have made the decision to jerk what is left of my diminishing funds out.
If I had taken the advice several months ago from the only cogent XX chromosome in my life, I would have more $$ to move to a more stable fund.
I am sure that my financial adviser will call me tomorrow after he reads my email and try to talk me out of pulling out.
At this point, I will ask him to transfer me and my account to a female adviser.



Seven Score And Five Years Ago

Government of the Auto Industry, by the Banks, for the Insurance Companies shall perish the PEOPLE from the Earth!





Monday, November 17, 2008

From November '81...half my life ago tomorrow



...my father died,God Rest His soul...then and today

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Vote For The "A" Side

Let me be the first to endorse a candidate for the city council who hasn't even thrown his hat in the ring yet.I have never met this man, nor spoken to him face to face.
Through the blogosphere I have come to "know" him as a person who cares about his city through his actions.Be it his attendance at city council meetings or his involvement in his neighborhood,"Tim Chaney Cares"."That" could be your campaign slogan and the following could be your campaign song.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Veteran's Day

The only veteran in my family was my father.His father and his father's father did not serve.However,the latter, according to his obituary was connected to the CSA as a secret service agent(spy).
My mother's father was over 30 and married when The Great War started and I assume that he was not called for those reasons.
During the Viet Nam era, my brother had a college exemption and my draft number was 365(if I could just be that lucky with Powerball).
My mother said that she would scrub floors to assure that neither of her sons would ever have to go to war.
That would have been a sight- a Phi Beta Kappa scrubbing floors!
Thanks Dad.
I am a fortunate son.

Monday, November 10, 2008

Real Life Movie

At 3:27 a.m. the answer came to me.
The line from a movie that so eluded me yesterday(call it a brain fart or a brain cramp) was solved.
"I can't think of a single thing" or something similar was spoken by Henry Fonda as Norman Thayer at his 80th birthday party in "On Golden Pond".

I searched for the exact words or a youtube clip, but could find neither.

I would have posted that clip if I had found it, but I would have been compelled to include the best clip from movie.

The clip from this movie is really a clip from real life.

Father and daughter really did not like each other in real life.Father was a staunch conservative and daughter was as opposite as opposites can get. It reminds me of the relationship between my own father and my sister.

I always well up when I watch this scene, because I know the reality of it.

I love my daughter.That's a given.

Just as important is that I like her!




Sunday, November 9, 2008

...And I Can't Think Of A Single Thing...

Is there a word in the English language that describes the inability to recall something that is on the tip of your tongue (the tip of your Temporal Lobe would be more accurate)?

I hate it when you can't recall something that you know the answer to. You just can't let it go. It gnaws at you. You just can't give your Temporal Lobe a rest until your tongue spurts it out.

I remember playing Trivial Pursuit in the 1980's with friends and family. My ex-wife and I were one wedge away from winning.The next question was for me and the win. I knew the answer, but my Temporal Lobe and my tongue were not speaking to each other that day.

The clock was ticking as the other team pressured me for an answer. We had never lost a game of Trivial Pursuit and I was damned if a tiff between my brain and mouth would end the streak.

My partner knew the answer. I told her to send it to me telepathically.She did and we remained undefeated.

What is gnawing at me today is a line from a movie, that for the life of me I can not recall. I have searched the internet for the answer to no avail (MOVIEQUOTES.COM, DIALOGUE4DUMBASSES.NET,YOUMUSTBEAREPUBLICAN.GOV.ORG)

..."And I can't think of a single thing"...is the line from the movie(an acceptance speech for someone retiring?) that I can't recall. It will come to me eventually.

The answer to the Trivial Pursuit question can be found in the following video.(3:50 in)

Friday, November 7, 2008

It's Alright If You Know Me, It's Alright If You Don't

Here's a breakdown of a conversation I had a few minutes ago.

Mother: You look young.
Son: No I don't. I look old.I used to look young.
Mother: I don't remember.
Son: You should, you've known me all my life.You know who I am, right?
Mother: You are my son.
Son: Yes. Do you need a diaper?
Mother: Yes. You know I changed many a diaper for you.
Son: Yeah, but I'm catching up to you.
Mother: Maybe, but I still have a couple on you.(Good answer)



Thursday, November 6, 2008

Savoy Brown - Poor Girl (Live)

This is the best that I could find...Not too shabby,eh?

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Rookie Wins Starting Job!

I did not vote for our next CEO. I was not impressed with his stats in the minor leagues. In my opinion, he only had a drink of water there.

I voted for the Gaylord Perry of the other league. I was not happy with his choice for reliever, but she could throw a spitball or two herself.

For the sake of all of us, I hope and pray that B.O. is not a bust in the likes of Heath Shuler, Ryan Leaf and Chris Washburn.

I hope and pray that he is another A.I.

WERE NOT TALKIN' 'BOUT PRACTICE! THIS IS THE GAME!

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

I Voted (twice)

Just kidding, but I could have.
When did the board of elections stop requiring proof of identification?
At the check in table, I fumbled through my wallet for my Voter Notification Card and picture I.D.
The lady behind the computer screen said(rather rudely),"Just gimme your name".
Just gimme your name?
I could have said that I was the guy with the Obama sign in his yard that lived down the street.
I could have gone back later and voted again, this time as myself.Who would know until the schmuck that lived down the street came to vote, only to be told that he had already voted.
Of course, I would never do this for two reasons:I am not a dishonest person and I know three of the poll workers and they know me.
Last, but not least, this is an historic election for my family.It is the first time since the 1940's that a family member did not cancel out another family member's vote.

Monday, November 3, 2008

Loco Boy Makes Good

It is true. I finally found the website that genealogically confirms it.The next president of the United States is related to me.
My great great great grandparents were there in black and white. You've made the big time Mary and Henry.

Now what do I do with it?

Just because he is my cousin don't mean squat.I had a cousin Ricky that would visit every Christmas and destroy all of our toys. He loved to take them apart, but he never knew how to put them back together again.We finally learned to hide them from him.

I will not vote for my cousin because I only have a few toys left and no where to hide them.

Hohner Bright

Musical talent does not run in my family. My maternal Grandfather could play the piano. I started guitar lessons when I was 12, but after the first lesson(when the instructor praised me for storing the pick between the strings. Duh?- I wasn't gonna drop it in the hole) the instructor died.I messed around with the instrument for several years. I never learned the chords, but I did enjoy pickin' lead to a few early 1970's albums(Savoy Brown and Neil Young in particular).The only instrument that my older brother ever attempted was a harmonica. He grew up in the 1960's and a harmonica was always part of the band. He wasn't that bad, either. Not one of us made it in the music business, but we do know a good song when we hear it.



Sunday, November 2, 2008

For Those About To Vote...I Salute You

Progress is good, but it is not always better. I never had a problem with those old lever voting machines.You enter the booth, pull the lever and the curtain closes.Put an X next to the candidate(s) of your choice and pull the lever.The curtain will open and your vote will be tabulated.
And it can't be hacked.



27 years ago, the #1 album on Billboard was by the same band that occupies that position today.
If it ain't broke, don't fix it!

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Little Walter

* * * * *

Pollsters, Meteorologists and Brain Surgeons

What's the difference between them?
The first two can be right 90% of the time and still keep their jobs!

There was a poll on AOL that asked the following two questions:
1) Who do you think will win the election?
Obama-58%
McCain-42%
2) Who do you want to win the election?
McCain-52%
Obama- 48%

On Tuesday, I will vote for the 9th time in a Presidential election. I have been wrong more times than I have been right. I feel that the trend will continue. I will do as I always do every four years: I will vote for another loser.

I can only dream about the following headline:

Friday, October 31, 2008

How To Carve a Pumpkin

I have lived in this house for 16 Halloweens and have not had 16 trick or treaters in all that time.
Halloween is not what it used to be.Back in the 1960's, my parents would open the door and pass out candy to almost 200 "door-knockers".

My mother never liked this so-called holiday. She referred to it as "gimme gimme day".
I don't care for October 31 either.I don't like strangers knockin' on my door any day of the year.
If I did, I would decorate my yard with cobwebs and jack-o-lanterns.

I will have candy available, just in case.But, I always buy something that I can consume.



Thursday, October 30, 2008

Sweatstock (1969)



"Give That Fan A Contract !"- Rex Barney

The "City of Brotherly Love" is World Series Champion. I actually watched the entire game for a change. It helped that it was only 3+ innings long. Hey, I get up early to go to work in the salt mines. It's not like it was my team, the Orioles. I'll be dead or retired by the time that they make a post season appearance.

Philadelphia should be proud of the Phillie's organization, management and players, as well as the fans.

The fans did not burn down the city and all in all were actually well behaved - well almost!

There was the following incident that was caught on tape.

The bad news is that some dumbass (shirtless also) climbed up on a traffic light pole and was brought down by a perfect toss.

The good news is that 4 or 5 NFL teams that are in need of an accurate quarterback may have a prospect.

Give that fan a contract!

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Is There Anybody Out There?

It is the age old question.
Are we alone in the universe?
Is there other intelligent life out there?
What's the deal with Area 51?
Have we been visited by extraterrestrials (other than in trailer parks in Louisiana)?

It occurred to me today that maybe WE are the aliens.
Maybe WE lived on a planet that was going "condo" and we had to move.
Maybe WE packed up our shit and hit the road.Maybe WE were running out of fuel and stopped on planet Earth for a bite to eat and some petrol, before continuing on.

Maybe WE decided to stay.
Maybe WE are the aliens.
Maybe WE brought those dinosaur bones with us.
Who the hell knows.You would have to ask Sam Cassell, because Rick James and Marty Feldman are gone!



Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Monday, October 27, 2008

Phillie Inpherno

To do list for a Phillie's phanatic:

1) Call in sick two days in advance.

2) Steal tickets out of wife's purse as she sleeps.

3) Fill phlask disguised as binoculars with liquor.

4) Call bail bondsman and put on retainer.

5) Mail velvet painting of Mike Schmidt to Trenton,NJ without postage (DO NOT FORGET TO INCLUDE RETURN ADDRESS).

6) Meet buddy at corner tavern and sell him wife's ticket.

7) Down 8 beers and 2 cheesesteaks.

8) Arrive at stadium and park in handicapped parking space (DO NOT FORGET TO LIMP).

9) Shout obscenities at every man, woman and child attired in Tampa Bay Rays gear.

10) Torch the city after team wins World Series!


Sunday, October 26, 2008

An Amazing Day!

Well,we did it.
We fulfilled a dying man's last requests.
It was all that he had asked for and then some.
It was an Amazing Day!

In attendance were five family members,
Eighteen dear friends,
And one rambunctious dog that resembled Petey.
What an Amazing Day!

One of his closest friends borrowed a kayak and paddled out to the middle of the pond.
Let me tell you that it was no easy task as the wind was gusting towards the shore at 30-40mph.
We had yet to see rain, but the sky was one large cloud and dark as dusk.
But yet,what an Amazing Day!

While "Blue Sky" played, my brother's ashes were scattered where he had wished them to be.
Standing on the shore, hugging my daughter as we both fought back tears,the most amazing thing happened.As soon as the last ash hit the water,I looked up to the sky to say goodbye and I saw the sun! It appeared at that very moment out of no where.It only stayed a few minutes.

Maybe there is a hereafter.
Maybe there is a Heaven.
Only he knows now.
I still can't get over the fact that the sun came out at that very moment.

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Friday, October 24, 2008

It Was A '56 Chrysler

Let It Rain

The forecast for tomorrow calls for rain.

I was so afraid that when I got home from work tonight that I would have a message on my voice mail from my brother's oldest daughter stating that the event was canceled due to inclement weather.No message is a good thing.

Brothers are not fair weather friends, they are all weather friends.

Let it rain!

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

The Geezers Have Never Left

This band was originated in 1961 and is possibly the oldest rock band still performing.


Tuesday, October 21, 2008

The Boys Are Back

I love this band! From THE BLACK ALBUM in 1980 to yesterday,I love this band!







Monday, October 20, 2008

Let The Voting Begin

Evidently, it already has.I was startled to hear today that 1/3 of the electorate have the option to cast their vote before the first Tuesday in November.I assume that the 3 letter networks will announce the winner tonight on their evening broadcasts.

I am not endorsing either of the candidates as both of them are unacceptable in my opinion.

I will vote, because it is the cornerstone of our way of government.

Who I will vote for can be found in 3 lines in the following song.

Betcha can't guess those 3 lines?

Friday, October 17, 2008

The Baritone Remembered

I remember singing this song on the sidewalk in front of my friend's house on Walnut St.in the mid 1960s.Me,my brother,my friend Gary and his brother,Ronnie.We were the Four Tops in that moment and time.It's amazing the little tidbits of one's past that are recollected with a nudge.



I also remember this movie and all the times that my daughter and I watched it.Memories are great!

From:bluesboozer

The following three songs are from a Youtube contributor that I came upon the other day while I was searching for God knows what. The first song I remember from The J.Geils Band.I believe that it was written and performed by Otis Rush.I like this version because the band includes a sax and a big bass guitar. As my brother would say:It ain't a real band if it don't have a sax(he was old school). All three selections are from obscure bands that I have never heard of.But I like obscure.I enjoy the hunt for a diamond in the rough.





Monday, October 13, 2008

Say It Ain't So Marcia,Marcia,Marcia(The Lost Brady Bunch Episode)

I'm appalled. The dream girl of 1950's born guys was a crack ho?
I'm appalled.I thought Marcia Brady was a good girl.
I'm not really appalled, I always liked Jan better any way.
Actually, I could care less about either one of you or that pigtailed sister of yours.
I just wanted a venue to post the following song that included the line..."She's a good girl".

The Stock Market Up Over 11%

Friday,I called my financial adviser to advise me on what to do with my diminishing retirement account. I just wanted him to tell me what I already knew.I may be dumb,but I'm not stupid.If I pulled out all my money,then I would be looking at losing 1/3 0f my investment.If I stayed in,I could recoup my losses.Should I Stay or should I Go Now?...Sounds like a trio of choices to me!





Wednesday, October 8, 2008

The Little Engine That Could

Thursday,October 30,2008
Fenway Park
Game 7
LA @ Boston
Bottom of the 9th
2 outs
Score tied
Jason Bay on 1st
Mark Kotsay at the plate
Crack of the bat
Ball hit towards left field
Ball rattles around in left field corner

What the fuck happened
Don't ask me
I was sitting in my car listening to the game on the radio because I had to cancel my cable and my electric has been turned off and my employer has cut my hours in half because they can't get the credit to meet payroll and I can't pay my bills even if I wanted to withdraw money from my retirement funds because there is nothing left and I am expected to vote next Tuesday because it is my civic duty.

Vote for who? Another crook that will take what little that I have left.I have nothing left but my dreams!

At the homeless shelter,I was able to access the computer for 5 minutes (cost me a trash bag of recyclable bottles) and I now know the outcome of the game.

The Sox win again

Manny is still Manny

And Al Bundy is my hero!



Monday, October 6, 2008

I Have To Go Home

Rest in Peace

I have no idea why I am such an unbeliever when it comes to the "afterlife". I grew up in a family that was not irreligious. We all went to church on Sunday morning. My mother was in charge of the altar guild.My father broadcast the services on his radio station.My sister and I were in the choir and my brother and I were acolytes.

But I never did 'git dat ole tyme religion' feeling.

I never did get that epiphany that makes you shake and holler and speak in tongues and throw away your crutches and walk the good life toward the divine experience.

Crutches?

I have so many issues, if I ever got to the pearly gates, St.Peter would have to take over the payments on my Lil Rascal scooter in order for me to enter.

Enough of me.

October 25th is the date for my brother's memorial.

A year before he died, he told me(and his youngest daughter) of his wishes.

He wanted his memorial to be held at a certain place in Delaware.
He wanted all his friends to attend and make it a party.
He wanted the following song to be played.

Worstest Episode Ever

If I don't get that song out of my head, then I am going to go to the local pawn shop,have them do a background check,wait the seven days and insert handgun in mouth!

Screw that idea...I don't have the money or the time to invest.

Bestest idea...Change the channel!





Sunday, October 5, 2008

Mythbusters

I have a new favorite TV show. At least for now(remember I have ADHD).
If you have a myth...they will bust it or confirm it.

I did not need any verification on the following myths as I am a parent to a very high spirited child.

Can Cats Fly?



Can A namdnilB Solve Rubik's Cube?



Can You Really Get Free Food Or Drinks At A Restaurant?

Friday, October 3, 2008

And The Winner Is.......(part2)

I actually watched all 90 minutes of the VP debate last night.I came away with three thoughts:

1) Biden is not as dumb as the media has portrayed him to be.

2) Palin is hotter than the media has portrayed her to be.

3) I had an unusual urge to dust off a decade old video,pop some popcorn and hit PLAY.



Is There A Doctor In The House?

I picked up the green garden hoe and proceeded to eradicate the weeds around the six tomato plants that lay in the rectangle in my back yard. It reminded me of the Champs-Elyse'es in Paris.









Thursday, October 2, 2008

And The Winner Is.......

There are numerous predictors that foresee the winner of each Presidential election.

Some of these predictors have proven over the years to hold true.

If the National League wins the World Series, the incumbent party will lose.

Whoever's halloween mask that is the best seller will win the White House.

When the Washington Redskins win their last home game before the election, the incumbent party retains the oval office.

And then there are some obscure predictors that focus on the menstrual cycles of sitting first ladies, but Goldrush ain't goin' there!(I've always been a fan of Eleanor Roosevelt).

At this point in my life, it does not matter who is the next leader of the free world.Nothing will change.My retirement fund will dwindle,I will work until I die and each day will be Groundhog Day.

Go Skins ! Hip Hip Hooray!









Tuesday, September 30, 2008

300

Vote For Doug

Since I've Been Gone

A lot has happened since my last post,(good) & (bad)
One of my favorite actors passed away.(bad)
Had another "Quality Moment"at Station 7: food and service-very good,company-exceptional as usual.(good)
My team beat their rival on the road.(good)
My 3rd digit-left hand is healing.(good)
I lost several thousand dollars of my retirement account in one day.(bad)
I am on vacation until next week.(good)
For a few days, the (good) outnumber the (bad).
For a few days, I will be off the road to perdition.
For now, I will leave with this rendition.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

bobfest

to be continued

Everything That Goes Around Comes Around...

...Or maybe never left?


In the case of the local band Tranzfusion,this would be a correct statement.

My twentysomething daughter and her boyfriend were invited by the wife of one of the members to hear them play the other night.They had a blast.Every request that they put forward was played and to quote my daughter,"Sounded better than the original". She said that they even utililzed a megaphone in their version of Aqualung.

Back in the early 1980's when I was still a twentysomething, this group was probably the best local cover band around.Whenever they played, the joint was packed and they put on a great show(and I'm sure I had a blast).

I checked out their website and found that they do originals also.I will post one of Tranzfusion's Youtube entries and one of my favorites(with or without megaphone).

If this is the original band, then they have aged better than I.......!




Friday, September 26, 2008

I Was So Much Older Then...I'm Younger Than That Now

Connecting With The Customer(Put a Smile In Your Voice When You Answer The Phone)

The company that I work for thinks that our region will make up a 20 million dollar shortfall in sales before the end of the year with three words:"See You Soon!".
They expect(demand) that every employee greets every customer with a cheery salutation upon entering the store,while shopping and when he or she leaves the store. At the same time the company is slashing hours and expecting perfection.How cheery can one be when you are doing the work of two?
I'm all for customer service, but enough is enough!
If you want to be Walmart...employ Greeters at the door.
Maybe I should work for a company that does not adhere to the maxim:The customer is always right. Sometimes the customer is an asshole and I'll be damned if I will kiss his or her ass!

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Mr. Slacum's Opus

When I stumbled upon this clip on youtube, I thought that I had found the very first version of JMB's "Rock 'n Roll Revival".
The band front was a dead ringer for my 11th grade teachers for Chemistry, Algebra and Phys.Ed.
If Nina had appeared on stage with jingle sticks,I think that I would have had a stroke!
Nonetheless, I like this clip...I like it a lot...I hope you do too.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

The Stranger

For several days a man stood in the field behind my house.This man was becoming a nuisance and I called the authorities to have the man removed.Several days later when the authorities finally responded to my call, the man was gone. All they found was a couple of buttons and his hat. Who was this man they just missed?

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Monday, September 15, 2008

Cleaning Out The Closet

I really need to clean out my bookmarks. The list is getting so long that I can cook dinner before I auto scroll down to my latest "save".
Before I delete everything, I am going to have a "yawd sale".
The following are a few of the video posts that will be appearing on my front lawn this Saturday(Rain or Shine).
"Yawd"-You actually wanted deez?











Richard Wright



Saturday, September 13, 2008

# s

Snappy, I Hardly Knew Ye!

After last week's category 5 hurricane that ravished Delmarva(according to one local grocery chain), I noticed a strange pattern of brown grass in my backyard.I knew that I had a problem.

According to Erma Bombeck, "The Grass Is Always Greener Over The Septic Tank". Actually that is a false assumption, but nevertheless a snappy title for a book.

Green grass or brown grass over the septic tank is dependent on the amount of rainfall. But if you have brown grass over your drain fields you better call in the experts.

So, I called Roto-Rooter.

Between the time that I called them to set up the appointment and the inspection,I made the fatal mistake of diagnosing the problem and tabulating the bill myself.Yep, I found it all on the internet.I needed an entire new septic system that would take days to install and cost me upwards of 20 thousand dollars.

Actually, the problem is not as severe as the internet told me.Steve, the Tech from R-R dug up my distribution box and ran a video camera down all three lateral lines .The left lateral that was covered by the dead grass and thought to be the problem, was clean as a whistle.The problem was that it was higher than the other two and all three had to be leveled.The leveling plus the pump out will cost about $450.00.I can deal with that.

The right lateral was not that clean,but the pump out would improve it's operation.

The center lateral,where I have a hole covered by a chalkboard(Steve said that if he filled in the hole until they came back next week that it would cost me more to dig it up again.He suggested covering it with a piece of plywood.I don't keep plywood in the closet,so I did the next best thing) was completely clogged by an unknown mass.

When he ran the camera down the central lateral, we found one part of the problem.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Thursday, September 11, 2008

The "I''s Have It! (Isaac and Ike)

Galvaston,Tx Sept.8,1900.
The "Great Storm" came without much warning.The storm surge killed an estimated 8,000 residents.There was no seawall.
Isaac Cline, the chief meteorologist for the state of Texas,had debunked the idea of a hurricane hitting Galvaston as absurd and the seawall was not built.
Isaac's Storm remains the greatest natural disaster to strike the U.S.

Galvaston,Tx Sept.11,2008.
Hurricane Ike is expected to make landfall tomorrow night. From what I have read,the authorities are not even offering shelters.As the Mayor said "It is best for people to leave".

The similarity between these two storm tracks are eerie.





Wednesday, September 10, 2008

It's Just A Shot Away (Altamont)

As Paul Harvey would say...Here's the rest of the story!



Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Sara Smile

Every Five Hundred Ninety Nine Seconds

Have you ever gotten up in the morning and had a song in your head,but you just could not put a name on it?
This song has been playing in my head all day long,over and over and over again!What the Hell is this song?
I will not get a minute's rest, until I find out the name of this song.

A LITTLE HELP, PLEASE !!!!!!!(!)

Saturday, September 6, 2008

The Garcia Syndrome

21 years,4 months and 7 days I have been on the job "accident free".Today the streak ended.And it is all Hanna's fault! Actually it is my employer's fault for over reacting to a mere tropical storm.In reality it is my fault:I am the one that put my middle finger in harms way.But if Hanna had not come our way, causing "my employer" to "freak out", I would not have been any where near "harms way". See, another point for happenstance over fate!

My middle finger is still intact(7 stitches), but still numb after nearly eleven hours.At least I'm not in pain...yet!

Speaking of happenstance, I came across a blog today that is a real hoot.

Ya'll need to check it out. It is called Goofs and can be found by searching for "grammarworks.blogspot.com"

Thursday, September 4, 2008

When The Levee Breaks

I can appreciate being cautiously prepared for an imminent natural disaster, but the company that I work for has gone off the "deep end" in my opinion.They have ordered the plywood and generators. They have canceled "all days off this weekend" for management personnel and distributed "call lists" of each and every employee (and they expect each and every employee to cancel each and every phase of their life on a moment's notice to race to work in the middle of a disaster to help this non appreciative company add a few more dollars to their bottom line, so their multi-millionaire stockholders can add one or two more cents to it's value).
I don't fuckin' think so!
I know of several employees that have only received a 10 cent raise in the last 3 years.
What is the panic all about?
Several inches of rain and 25 mph winds.
By the way, the "Regional Manager" is inspecting the stores this weekend.I guess he didn't get the email! I hope the MFer takes off his coat and tie and helps out if his "gravytrain" is correct about the imminent disaster.
None of this will happen, because the company that I work for could not find their hat if it was handed to them.